Finding Brotherhood in Islam: My Experience with Born Muslims

When I embraced Islam nine years ago, I thought the hardest part would be learning how to pray, memorizing Arabic, and adjusting to a new way of life. But over time, I realized that one of the biggest challenges—and blessings—was something I hadn’t thought much about: forming real friendships with born Muslims.

As a revert, you often feel like you’re walking between two worlds. You’ve left behind a lifestyle you once knew, and while you’ve stepped into the beauty of Islam, it can feel unfamiliar and even lonely at times. That’s why having sincere, practicing Muslim friends is one of the greatest gifts a revert can receive.

The First Encounters

In the beginning, I was hesitant. Would they accept me? Would they see me as “less Muslim” because I didn’t grow up with the deen? I had so many doubts, but the first time I was welcomed into a gathering of practicing Muslims, all of that disappeared.

There was no interrogation about my past. No judgment. Just warmth, brotherhood, and an unspoken understanding that we were all on the same path—striving to please Allah.

I remember the first time I was invited for iftar during Ramadan. I sat with brothers who had been fasting since childhood, effortlessly following traditions I was still learning. But instead of making me feel like an outsider, they guided me, encouraged me, and made me feel like I belonged.

Lessons from Born Muslims

Being around born Muslims taught me things that no book or YouTube video ever could:

1. Islam is more than just knowledge; it’s character.
   I met Muslims who didn’t just practice Islam—they lived it. Their kindness, generosity, and patience spoke louder than their words. Seeing their actions reminded me that Islam isn’t just about learning rules but about embodying good character.
   
   
2. Brotherhood in Islam is real.
   I used to think “Ummah” was just a concept, but real Muslim friendships showed me otherwise. When I was struggling, my brothers supported me. When I had questions, they guided me. When I felt lost, they reminded me to turn back to Allah.
   
   
3. Cultural Islam vs. True Islam.
   One of the biggest eye-openers was realizing that not everything born Muslims do is Islam. Many practices are cultural, not religious, and as a revert, I had to learn to distinguish between the two. My real Muslim friends helped me focus on the essence of the deen, not just traditions.

The Struggles of a Revert Among Born Muslims

Of course, not every experience was smooth. Sometimes, I felt out of place. Some people assumed I already knew things that were second nature to them, like how to perform wudu properly or what to say after sneezing. There were moments of frustration, but instead of letting it push me away, I learned to ask, to observe, and to grow.

One of the hardest parts was dealing with expectations. Some born Muslims assumed that because I embraced Islam, I had to be super religious—praying all night, memorizing Quran immediately, and never making mistakes. But the truth is, I was still learning, still struggling, still human.

The Beauty of Being Among Practicing Muslims

Despite the challenges, I wouldn’t trade these friendships for anything. They made me a better Muslim. They reminded me that Islam is not about where you come from but where you’re going.

To my fellow reverts: Seek out good Muslim friends. Surround yourself with those who remind you of Allah, who push you to improve, and who make you feel like you belong.

To my born Muslim brothers and sisters: Be patient with reverts. We may not know everything, but our hearts are sincere. A simple smile, an invitation, or a small act of guidance can change our lives.

Islam is not just a religion; it is a family. And through the friendships I’ve built, I’ve come to realize that whether we were born into Islam or embraced it later in life, we are all on the same journey—toward Allah, together.

May Allah bless us with righteous company and keep us steadfast in our faith. Ameen.

- Syed 🌹